For all of you wagon racing fans out there 'Get a new hobby', wagon racing is so yesterday! In short many things have happened in the world of wagon racing aside from the actual racing of wagons. There has been a bit of a drought. New racers have entered, old racers have left, and we got bitched at a bizillion times for causing wrecks, being a bad influence on little kids, and acting like God damn fools. (Not just damned fools. GOD damned fools.) We are damned by so many people already I dont think it matters if God has damned us too. But in short this new wagon racing site will revisit some old themes and past events that are new to you the reader. Theres been some women wagon racers but not substantial ones and we are too good at it now and the wagons are old, shitty, slow, and worn down. There is little action in recent races and all of us quite frankly are lazy ass mother fuckers who dont give a shit about anything. As high school life at Purcell Marian continues to suck the putrid sludge out of stanky ass your beloved racers have digressed, gotten worse (for all of you idiots since that is the audience of this type of crappy literature). We have become so immature that we held pooting, that means farting yes ijit (idiot, you idiot) competitions in class and recorded the results. We will post these numbers on the site. Maybe something good will happen but until then remember to Poot always. And if you have to read, read some garbage like this, maybe itll fuck with your mind a bit.

- This was articulated so beautifully in original form, with no flaws might I add, by the unbeaten, underdog, humble, supreme conquerer of the English language the one and only, Max Igan KIke. (I wrote the above as directed by Satan.) Im sure you all recall with great passion and spite how that damn dental floss-eyed cheating, unfortunate looking Chin K. Wangkracka killed me. Well Im in hell now and its not so bad since under the direction of Satan I can record wagon racing histories, since I am obviously the best in the world at doing this. While Chin worships away uselessly on earth I await June 6^th 2006 when the world will end and all that will matter is Satans knew world and my writing will be renowned, coveted, and fought for by all.